Thanks for all of the encouragement! Becoming a parent is always hard, but jumping into discipline and dealing with past issues brings a whole new set of challenges. Thanks for letting me vent--I'm sure it won't be the last time. ;)
The circus won! We're going to Circus Flora on Sunday for Father's Day and Dima's birthday. Shh...the boys don't know yet. Mainly that's for Dima's sake. This poor kid has been tossed around so much in the past few years that change really gets to him. He does fine during the change, but if he knows something's coming, he worries. He doesn't need to worry, but he hasn't been here long enough to trust us and understand that the changes/surprises we have for them are almost always good (doctor visits excepted, of course).
As an example, after we had ice cream on Monday night, Zhenya rode back with Mark (he met us there after work) and Dima chose to ride with me. As we were driving, I talked with Dima about "surprises". When I picked the boys up from school on Monday, I told them I had a surprise for them (the circus, and later ice cream). Zhenya's eyes lit up--Dima frowned. I asked if they liked surprises, and Zhenya said yes with a big smile, and Dima said no with a worried look on his face. So when we were driving home after ice cream, I talked with Dima about the surprises we had had that day, and asked him if he liked them. He smiled and said yes. But I know he doesn't know what the circus is, so if I tell him we're going to the circus he will spend the next few days worrying over what that means and whether or not it's good. So he'll find out on Sunday so he can only worry for an hour or so. ;)
Thursday, June 12, 2008
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3 comments:
Great story about Dima. Hope you guys have a blast today at the circus! (Happy Father's Day to Mark!)
Hope the circus and Father's day went well! T still does not like changes, even good ones. It is true they learn to trust routine rather than people. Then again, some adults are still that way without any childhood issues! May God continue to bless you and yours!
My daughter is exactly like that, and she isn't adopted. It's just the way she is programmed. She worries about anything she doesn't understand, or anything she expects to be upsetting. Generally she gets more upset by the worrying than the actual event, so I have also taken to not telling her about things until the last minute.
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